Sunday, February 10


I have been having lots of headaches and migraines for the last couple of weeks. On Thursday my Doctor gave me some new tablets that contain 100mg of caffeine. I was a bit nervous about taking them because I was afraid they would make sleeping even more difficult. I was supposed to take two at the onset of symptoms. Everytime I try and talk to anyone about the flashbacks of sexual abuse I have been having, I get a migraine. So this morning I was talking to Ian and a migraine started so I took two of the tablets. Unfortunately my heart started racing and I was shaking badly, so no more caffeine tablets for me. I don't drink coffee so I don't think my body is used to that much caffeine. They did work on the migraine but the side effects aren't worth it.
I am really nervous about seeing the psychologist tomorrow, actually I am absolutely terrified. Why? Don't know, I really think I am just scared of dealing with everything that has happened in the last few months. Tried so hard not to think about it today but have had a few big crying sessions, one with Ian and one with Kristianne. Going to try and lose myself in a book tonight, 'The Queen's Fool', by Philippa Gregory, of course! Have all the Tudor books now. Kristianne made me watch 'Elizabeth' with her this afternoon so it got me all enthusiastic.

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